So, this past month has been kinda crazy for me. Really a time of trying to figure things out. I bet I know the next question that you’re going to ask: well, did you figure it out?
I chose to come here. I believe without a shadow of a doubt that this is where I need to be, where God wants me to be. It’s just really hard, because not only am I now an adult and need to figure out what that means, I also need to figure out how to do well at university, while trying to find a community and some awesome friends here. See, I happen to have some pretty awesome friends at ‘home’ in Hershey which honestly mean a lot to me. But I can’t live my life in Hershey from here… So where’s the balance between maintaining my friendships at home and still be ALL here in Calgary, Canada?
I’ve also been really aware of the fact that as a Christian, I’m in a battle. And because of that, I’ve been feeling quite a bit of spiritual attack lately. Probably more than I’ve felt before. But, I’ve learned, especially this past week, that the best defense is the spiritual armor of God. Praying and asking for each part of the armor not only equips me for the battles ahead, but it also reminds me of the important things that I need to hold on to and cherish, such as the truth, righteousness, being secure in my salvation… etc. This has also led me on a journey of thinking clearly about what I actually believe without a shadow of a doubt. I’ve written it down, with the Scriptures to back it up, because, in times of attack, it’s important for me to be able to look at that and read the truth that I’ve written.
A couple of months ago, my mom and I had a really long talk about all that was coming in the very near future. For many of my decisions in the past, my parents have been a huge influence, and often the final say on the decision. But with Ambrose, my parents had some misgivings. Not about the school in general, but about moving so far away, along with a couple other factors as well. But, I believed, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that this was where I was supposed to be, and my parents supported me. When I was talking with my mom, she said that part of the reason they wanted to support me in this was for two reasons: 1. They knew that I was seriously seeking after Christ and so they wanted to believe that I was making my decisions based on God’s leading and extensive prayer. 2. For quite a while, I have second-guessed myself when it comes to something that I feel that God has asked me to do. There are reasons and events that happened that caused this several years ago, but it definitely has affected my decision-making process. And one of the things my mom said to me that day was that this was my time. This is my time to make some of my own decisions, figure out my faith for myself, find those wings and fly with them.
And I honestly feel that way. So much is happening right now, that I don’t think I can process it all. But I know that when I look back on this year, I’m going to be amazed at what God has done with me. He’s made it very clear that this is His time to make me new. And I’m super excited about that.
On a side note… love is in the air around me and I’m so excited for the people around me. My sister just recently got into a relationship, and one of my really good friends, and mentors and my boss over the summer just got engaged!!!! This is the first of my friends to get engaged… granted, she is quite a bit older than me. But, I’m SOOOO EXCITED, for her!! 🙂 So stinking pumped. And I’m already trying to figure out how I can get there for the wedding. 😀
Anyway, those are my ramblings… 🙂
Prayer Requests: That those of us university students will survive this semester enough to recuperate and start all over again next semester. And, that we would all allow God to mold us into new creations, the people that He made us to be.